Tuesday, September 26, 2006

i just blogged my pants

The funny thing about a blog, you see, is that the site is based on the principal that people want to read to what you have to say. I don't really have anything to say. Avoiding Italian homework at 2 a.m. is a good enough reason for me, however, to start a website, so that, friends, is what I am doing.

First and foremost, though, who chose the word blog? Seriously, what a stupid fucking word. That has probably been my biggest challenge in my new blogging career. Coming to terms with the stupid ass word blog. Why not "e-log" or "o-log" or "masturbation machine diary thing"? I'm proposing a swift and orderly change, or coup d'etat as the French call it.

So anyways, it's fair to assume that at this point if you are reading this you already know me, but let me give you an idea of who(how awesome) I think(know) I am. I'm 6'3, 170 lbs. of unadultered hot. Too hot for tv, in fact. Just hot enough for a blog, though. I'm pretty awkward to speak with because I have a tendency to offend your ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, odor, or any combination thereof the first time I meet you. After that, though, I'll have you eating out of the palm of my unwashed hand with witty catchphrases and a "Why is he wiping his bare ass on the carpet? Genius!" feeling. You know you like the sound of that.

Honestly, I don't know what I'll write about. It's like an adventure without the excitement! As the retarded hyena from Disney's The Lion King says, be prepared...

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